Monday, 24 May 2010

Middle Class Tantrum

Supermarkets really do define social classes don't they?

Never was this more clear than this afternoon.

When I'm in Tesco I often hear kids saying in a whiney voice:
"Muuu-uum can we get some sweets?"
"Muu-uum I WANT some CRISPS!!"

But today in Waitrose I heard:
"Mummy, shall I get the brioche?"

Sunday, 23 May 2010

More Things A Daddy Has Learnt

1. Always rinse the bath out properly before bathtime.  I think it's fair to say that you shouldn't find pubic hair on them for at least another 12 years.

2. If you have a bath toy Octopus by all means call him 'Olly' but if you have a bath toy Whale refrain from calling him 'Willy'. It's fine for a while until you shout out 'Come and look! He's playing with Willy in the bath!' whilst your neighbours are paying a house visit.

3. Taking a baby swimming is awesome but getting them dried on your own is hard work. Some how you end up being more wet than if you'd jumped in fully clothed.

4. Even though when 'swimming' with a baby all you do is spin in a circle, lift, push etc.. without doing any lengths or diving.. you still leave the pool absolutely starving like you've just swum the channel. How is that possible? Do vending machine operators pump something into the air that makes you crave Frazzles, Tootie Frooties and Lilt?

5. Having re-read point '1' again I think I should add that you probably shouldn't 'find' pubic hair on a 12 year old, they should simply discover it themselves.