Tuesday, 28 September 2010

First Capital Connect Customers on Twitter

I wonder whether the bosses of train company First Capital Connect ever check Twitter.

They needn't leave those customer surveys on the seats like they sometimes do. They could just take a look and see what people think of them in less than 149 characters.

I should point out I don't use FCC, have no vendetta against them and haven't spent ages filtering search results by the way, the following is a genuine snapshot of Twitter though and they may feel free to use it in the AGM:

1. @jimmylemas
Hats off to first capital connect for their on-train toilet facilities. It was like having a slash in the Diana memorial fountain.

2. @StormingHeaven
First Capital Connect must be intimately aware of how unimaginably sh*t their trains are, and yet they still persist without any shame.

3. @HalleStar
That's it I officially hate first capital connect trains.

4. @erinwonderland
First Capital Connect. Why are you so sh*t? Why is it always my train that runs late?! Eurgh.

5. @MissSadiMarie
Glad the weather has picked up for the ride home, shame first capital connect have f**ked up the trains as per usual. Twats.

6. @prdsgn
F*** You First Capital Connect!!!

Guess how many seats are free on the First Capital Connect to London Kings Cross consisting of 8 carriages?

@ThisIsSammy you and First Capital Connect just need to shag and get it over with

First Capital Connect: Your customers are not all cold blooded reptiles that need constant 45C

Just a quick message for first capital connect: YOU F*** F***ING F****ERS OF COMPLETE F***NESS GIVE ME MY F****ING MONEY BACK YOU F***S

You see, First Capital Connect, the trouble with making people's trains late in 2010 is you're just giving them more time to Tweet.

Thursday, 9 September 2010

Google Instant

Have you seen that Google’s changed? It now has "Google Instant"

No longer do internet searches have to be percolated or plunged from a Google-tiere, no.. just one spoon, add boiling water and you know what you wanted to know.
Basically it tries to guess what you’re typing and starts searching before you’ve finished. A bit like those annoying people who try and finish your sentance and then get it wrong but try again nonetheless when you restart.

Through their research/spying on our every move, they find the average user used to take more than 9 seconds to enter a search item but.. get this.. they saw that some people took 30 to 90 seconds to type!! Really?! What were they doing?! Using their nose?! Were their hands tied? Were they searching for a hostage negotiater?

But now Google Instant can save 2-5 seconds per search and they say in their press release that if everyone uses Google Instant around the world then 3.5 billions seconds will be saved a day! That’s 11 hours saved every second! Which means if everyone used it by the end of October we could actually be back in June when it was sunny! I think. Hang on, let me look that up...